Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Just Deserts

Comeuppance. Punishment. Karma. As ye sow, so shall ye reap.

This is what we get for tolerating woodchucks when they come into our backyard to chew on the field corn we put out for the squirrels to keep the squirrels from monopolizing our bird feeders.


Remember when I told you about “Beth”? Well there are indeed two of those woodchucks, and as the weather’s been getting cooler, they’ve been growing (even) fatter, more “senatorial.”

And last weekend, we revitalized the flower bed under the bird feeders, planting four awesome, fully budded and flowering chrysanthemum plants (from Longfellow’s, so you know they’re excellent plants) . . . and guess what happened.

I like how they left some flower petals behind on the mulch, like crumbs. Nice touch.

I imagine the conversation between the woodchucks.

“Mmmmm, I loooooove this time of year, don’t you!”

“Yeah, all these great plants and flowers to eat. Hey, which of these do you like better, the yellow, or the pink?”

“Well, the yellow are pretty good, but I like the pink ones better because they taste spicier . . . !”

. . . Blah, blah, blah, blah. (You have to make up a voice that sounds like a big tubby rodent’s.)

. . . Okay, actually, they could never say these things to each other, because every time we see them, they’re chewing. They have their mouths full. So instead they’d have to, um, telepathically communicate these thought to each other, right?

. . . Kind of how I’m telepathically communicating with you, now. Dorky as they may be, you are reading my thoughts. Man, I'm sorry. My apologies. Maybe tomorrow it will get better.

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